Our lives were forever changed the day we lost Corey. He was an amazing man who loved the Lord and his family with all that he was. The pain of losing him is like no other. Our only comfort comes from knowing we will see him again someday.

I have moved the slideshow played at Corey's service to it's own post page above, titled "Corey's Memorial Service - August 10, 2010"

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Saturday, February 5, 2011

An unending love...even in death

     Romans 8:35,37-39 ~ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

     Six months ago today Corey departed this earth for his journey home to be with the Lord.  It's hard to believe the girls and I have been living daily life without him for that long. This is the longest I've been separated from him and it continues to be painful, to say the least. I've been thinking a lot lately about God's love for me and how unending it is. As part of our wedding ceremony we wanted special attention drawn to God's unending qualities. Before typing this I listened to parts of our service to try to locate what was spoken before we exchanged rings. My tears were flowing as I listened to Corey profess his love for me and I for him. Hearing us both repeat the "til death do us part" line was like having a knife twisted into my heart. I know...I kind of set myself up for that one!
Here is what the pastor read about the symbolism of our rings:
     "The circle has long been a symbol of God without beginning or end and with no point of weakness.  The circle is a reminder of the eternal quality of God and of unending strength. Thus these rings serve to remind us of the relationship Corey and Jill have with God as well as the relationship they have with one another.  The rings are symbols of covenant and should serve as reminders of our need to be faithful in all relationships."
     Thanks be to God that because of Christ's death on the cross on our behalf, my relationship with Corey is unending just like his wedding band that I now wear next to mine on my finger. (I'm still not sure how I'm ever going to stop wearing them.) Our earthly matrimony may have come to an end but in Christ we will always be in relationship. And once reunited we will love each other with the perfect love of Christ forever! What a gift from God.
     In exchanging our wedding rings our vows read -
"I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you, my covenant to be your husband/wife, and to be faithful to you and as a reminder of God's presence in your life."
     I had forgotten about that last part. We were intentional about the wording for our vows and made some changes to the traditional wording to incorporate our relationship with God. Shortly after I told Abigail her Daddy had died she asked me, "Who's going to be your husband now?" I told her that God would be. I hadn't even thought about how my wedding ring is representative of that also. I guess I do have a good reason to not ever take them off! :)
     In remembrance of the 6-month anniversary of Corey's passing the girls and I made a trip through deep snow to Corey's stone. Once again, the road leading to his grave had not been plowed. With all the snow we've been hit with this week I just don't think the town has been able to keep up with everything. I was prepared this time though and proceeded to unload our snow shoes from the car. (Grandma Janie had gotten the girls each a pair for Christmas). We hiked in and started digging the stone out. I was also prepared with a nice big shovel. The top of Corey's stone was at least a good 6 inches down. I dug out all around it and placed a heart wreath on top. There are 6 white roses in the middle to represent the 6 months we've been without him. The red rose and two pink roses are what we the girls and I placed on his casket at his Memorial service. I plan to leave the wreath on until after Valentine's Day passes.  Of course if the weather keeps on like it has been, it will long be covered by then. As I write this it is now thundering and lightening out! Crazy New England weather...I might have to rescind my comment about not ever wanting a condo in Florida ;)

I wasn't sure if taking the girls to the cemetery was the right thing. They weren't too excited about the idea when I brought it up this morning but that was mainly because they were comfortable in our warm house playing with their Littlest Pet Shops and watching cartoons.  I roped Abigail in easily enough by telling her she was going to get to help decorate Daddy's stone with lots of hearts and flowers. Allison is never an easy sell. Everything is on her own terms and in her own time. I told my mom today that she's like a cat ;) Guess that's why her nickname is Alicat! By the time we got to Milton Mills both girls were in a good frame of mind about our mission. While a little zany, Abi's decorating had the love of a child for her daddy written all over it!
     I knew I had made the right choice to bring the girls when Abi said, "This reminds me of Daddy." while she was sitting next to his stone. I asked her what it was that reminded her of him. She said his stone. I replied, "That's why we have this place, so we can come and remember Dad." I went on to remind her of all the things that daddy liked that were a part of this place - the trees, the open space, all the snow!!  I know Corey would have been proud of the 3 of us out there with our snow shoes on. He always loved being outdoors - so much more than I did, especially in the winter time!


1 comment:

  1. Beautiful, Jill... thanks for sharing your heart with us. Looking at the girls in the snow just reminded me of the pictures you have of Corey & the girls playing outside in the snow. They had fun together! He is proud of you! :o) I cried reading about your rings...I'm sorry for the pain you have to walk through. It's such a hard journey. thinking of you always. love, Stacy